Insomnimusing: Allons-y!

Gin took a header down the stairs tonight and is nursing a black eye now. To make matters worse, she has no lens in the other eye due to an injury she sustained during a playtime accident when she was five. So she's wandering around with an ice pack on her "good" eye and is pretty much unable to see at all. We're just trying to keep it from swelling shut, or she won't be able to go to school tomorrow, since she can't see out the other one. I've been saying for five years now that she's bound and determined to blind herself completely.

Munch is traumatized. Actually, she's devastated. She's an animal lover, and tonight, a cute little kitten was hovering around our front porch. Naturally, she scooped him up and sneaked him into our newly cleaned storage room with a can of cat food. She kindly left the light on for him, so of course, I opened the door to turn the light off and found the little thing. Big, mean mommy picked up the kitten - and the food - and put them both out on the porch. Well, Munch waited about four seconds - as soon as Mommy was distracted going through school papers - and opened the door for him to come in again. But Mommy came down the stairs and caught her. So she slammed the door - on the kitten's foot. Fortunately, he wasn't any further through the doorway, because she slammed it hard. He was hurt, but it's not a serious injury. Munch broke down in tears listening to the poor, little thing wailing in pain and watching him limp around, and I made it clear to her how much more

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It was my day off today. (I get one every two weeks.) I picked up Book, and he and I had lunch with the girls at Nana's house. Our usual Saturday routine. While there, the routine definitely got a twist when my stepdad went into an insulin reaction (he's diabetic). He broke out in a sweat and started convulsing. Mom gave him his emergency Glucagon shot, and we waited it out, sponging him down and keeping him on his side where he'd fallen on the living room floor. She has little sympathy for him anymore, and I can't say I blame her. He drinks - a lot. And last night he was drinking again. He's had a kidney transplant already - a gift from his son, my stepbrother. But he doesn't take care of himself. He's on a boatload of medications because of the diabetes and the transplant, and yet he goes on drinking. He takes his meds on top of the drinking, then doesn't eat anything before going to bed. Then he wakes up and his blood sugar has bottomed out. She's

I watched the presidential debate tonight, but I'm not going to offer any analysis or boil it down for you. I think that's a mistake. I don't think you should listen to my views on it. I don't think you should read the news stories about the debate, filled with individual quotes selected by someone else. I don't think you should watch the soundbites on the cable news shows and hear the spin from both sides' pundits. I think every American of voting age with any interest in who will become the leader of this great nation should sit down and WATCH these debates themselves - in their entirety - and pay attention. Cut through the spin, cut out the interpretations, and really listen. Pay attention. Make your own decisions and draw your own conclusions. Be fully informed and do the work for yourself. Don't count on someone else to spoon-feed their views to you. Use your head. This is important. There's a vice-presidential debate coming up next Thursday, Oct.

We had the first meeting at work yesterday for the newly established Web Board, which consists of me (the webmaster for our three newspapers), the Internet Project Sales Manager, the Internet editor for one of the papers and my home paper's editor. The committee was established to guide content on the sites but also to provide some kind of oversight for the forum, in which the IPSM has been far overstepping his authority and making unilateral decisions that were not only proving unpopular among our users but also stepping on their constitutional rights. This is the issue that has had me pretty irate over the past couple of weeks. Anyway, as I was virtually ignored in my protests, I was determined to express no opinion and just be a drone when it came to the forums. Naturally, I was totally unable to do that, as it turned out. I'm too passionate about such things to just bite my tongue. I can't help myself. So, I made some suggestions. The rest of the board agreed. They were

Time. There seems to be so little of it. And as the days grow shorter, it seems my days are growing shorter, too. How is it that the time between 4 p.m. and 9 p.m. - when the girls need to get all of their things done for school and chores and baths and dinner - is getting shorter? Every day, it seems to be later when things get done. The girls are to be in bed by 9, but we can't seem to get finished until 9:30 or 10 or even later. Where does the time go? How does it go so quickly? There's always so much to do. We can't spend any time relaxing. Every evening is a constant whirlwind of activity. I can't get anything done at all because I'm overseeing their work. And I'm doing it all alone. Tomorrow's going to be worse. I have an afternoon meeting at work, so I'll be home even later. I'll be lucky if I get the girls to bed by 11.

Depression is such a hard thing to deal with, especially when there is little to no support around. The only choice to try to make it through is to seize upon whatever little joys can be found and relish them. For that reason, I won't apologize or feel embarrassed that I was able to find such an emotional lift from my passion/obsession today. I watched a replay of Sunday's Chelsea v. Man U match, which happened to be the one I tried to watch online Sunday, but the streams were all down. It was an exciting match, and I smiled and cheered throughout the whole match. It ended 1-1, which works well for me, as I haven't yet officially decided between the two teams (although, I have to admit, I really think I'm leaning toward Man U - sorry G, but I promise I'll still back Inter Milano). Tomorrow's employee appreciation day at the office. We get to wear jeans without paying a buck for the privilege, and the bosses are providing lunch. We also get to play a few games at

I spent a long, miserable birthday in the office today. My mother called and invited me to lunch, likely because she knew no one there would be offering. With an office full of signs posted with the September birthdays, no one said a thing to me. One person did send an e-mail to me. I was ridiculously grateful for that one acknowledgment. The two birthdays last week - the only other two birthdays in the office this month - got balloons and streamers. I knew that wouldn't happen. I've been there six years this month. Longer than about 90 percent of the staff. If you want to make friends, be one. Isn't that what they say? I'm kind and generous and loyal and loving and helpful. I don't know what more I can do. I've spent immeasurable amounts of time being there for other people whenever they've needed someone. I've listened. I've comforted. I've never been too busy to help. But no one is there for me. All I could think about today was the fact that

My birthday is tomorrow. I'll be 36 years old, and I haven't much to show for it, aside from my kids. They're my success story, and the only one I've got. I spent my birthday weekend as follows: Saturday - work --> pick up my son Book from his dad's (my first husband) --> lunch with the kids at Nana's --> take the girls to their dad's (my second husband) --> clean house for nine hourse, including a full work-over of the kitchen, downstairs bathroom and living room, plus steam-cleaning the carpet Sunday --> work --> take Book home --> pick up the girls --> lunch --> grocery shopping --> back home for more work --> get the girls ready for school --> crochet half a scarf --> more work writing my column. Fun, huh? The scarf is my first crochet project in more than five years. My son Pooh's ex-girlfriend has a brother who is mentally disabled, and I'm making it for him. He called me out of the blue a couple of weeks

It was a largely uneventful day. I sent off a brief e-mail to the publisher of the newspaper group for which I work expressing my displeasure at a recent policy decision, and later, I chatted for a bit with a new acquaintance from Sudan. I chatted briefly with Z as well. I seem to be suffering a malaise today. I haven't eaten all day, aside from a little snacking here and there. I have no appetite. I've slept very little the past two nights. My thoughts are in disarray, and my heart is no better. I feel as though nothing is solid. Nothing is secure. It's a struggle even to hold onto hope anymore sometimes.

I was working with Munch on her schoolwork tonight, and I saw that her "show to parent and return to school" folder was filled with reading test reports that I had already signed. I was a bit confused by this, so I dug a little further through the folder and found a note that said in addition to my signature, I was required to write an encouraging comment along with my signature. Now, maybe it's just me, but when my daughter brings me her papers, I go through all of them with her, and I give her praise and encouragement and hugs in person. I find it a bit offensive that the teacher requires that I write "good job!" or "well done!" or "keep up the good work!" on her results forms. My signature verifies that I have seen the results. The hours of drills and flashcards show my active involvement. And my personal praise and hugs show my love and support. So why should I be forced to write some empty sticker slogan on her papers? How meaningful

I'm sort of in limbo with the recent work drama. After dropping the dime on a coworker (henceforth known as Schmuck) for some serious ethical breaches, he was confronted with the evidence I provided by the publisher, my editor and his own direct supervisor. Fortunately, the publisher did not bring my name into the matter. Instead, he told Schmuck that the IT department had found the proof of his misdeeds. My editor did not fill me in on the details of the discussion, but he did tell me that a "decision" was to be made on it today (Wednesday). I left the office before I heard anything further on it, so I'll probably have to wait until Friday to find out what happened. At least I won't be subjected to harassment by Schmuck, regardless of the decision, because he has no idea (or at least the publisher told him otherwise) that I was the one who turned him in. So anyway, part of the reason I left without finding out (other than the fact that my work was really finished

(for more of my work, see my Art Therapy album )

Am I officially an addict for watching two European football matches at the same time? While watching Chelsea - Bordeaux on TV, I was watching Liverpool - Marseilles online. I cheered the return of Michael Ballack to the pitch, who's been out with injury for the past couple of weeks. Ballack's one of my favorite footie crushes. And I'd like to add that I loooooove the tradition of swapping shirts at the end. Woohoo! Footballers are easily the hottest men on the planet. Truly. (Of course, I wouldn't want to get involved with one.....those boys have baaaaaad reputations.....) I talked to D tonight a bit, and he said he's going to the Manchester United game tomorrow. Yep. I'm jealous. I made meatballs for dinner. Not a big deal other than the fact that they were a smashing success with all the kids. Munch took a bite and said, "Mom, you should be a chef!" I can make them almost anything now, and they're always willing to try it. Munch occasionally is

Halloween is coming! Where has the time gone? The kids have already been harassing me about what costume they'll wear this year. Sometimes we cook something up at home, and sometimes we buy something at the store. Of course, homemade costumes are time-consuming, and that's something I have precious little of lately. And the ones at the store, well, what can I say? The selection is usually pretty lousy, and whatever you buy, there will be 37 others walking around in the same thing, because we're all shopping at the same stores. Add to that the fact that they're usually low-quality and horrendously overpriced, and the store option isn't really all that great of an option either. I had a brainstorm a couple of weeks ago on what my costume will be for our dress-up day at work (it's brilliant! I'll post pics or at least tell you about it ... if I manage to pull it off), and Gin actually asked if she can just cut a couple of holes in a sheet and go as a ghost. Wel

It's very possible that I made my own life a living hell today. I blew the whistle on a coworker. It was a question of journalistic ethics and Constitutional freedoms, and even though I have now opened myself up to some serious retribution, I couldn't keep my mouth shut on it. I am unbending when it comes to journalistic ethics and standards. Call me an idealist - it wouldn't be the first time. I'm going to take a nap now. Righteous indignance can be sooooo taxing. *** Update: I just got a phone call on my cell - an hour after close of business - from the coworker in question. And he just sent me a PM on our message board. Oh hell, I think I'm about to get hit with a whole lot of harassment. Oh look, there's my phone again. It's him again. I'm not answering.....

We had near hurricane force winds today - up to 70 mph. We've got power out all over the area. I got lucky. Mine only blipped out for a few seconds. My parents' was out longer. Just a few minutes drive south of here, thousands have lost power. Trees are down. Power lines are down. Roofs are peeled. Hurricane Ike has struck ... Ohio. The winds started early this morning, but they really picked up as we were driving Book back home. We passed by cornfield that so reminded me of a scene from "Twister" that I called out, "Cow!" Then I looked around the car and realized that none of the three children riding with me had ever seen "Twister," so I just looked moderately confused as far as they were concerned. When we got home, the wind was whipping so hard against the house and debris was flying everywhere - I felt like I was in the Wizard of Oz. A broomstick did fly by and get stuck in a bush in the backyard. Dorothy surrenders. *** How pathetic will I l

I tried to watch SNL last night, so I could see the much-hyped season premiere hosted by Michael Phelps and the much-rumored return of Tina Fey to play Sarah Palin. I missed the first five minutes, so apparently I missed the Fey/Palin part, and I struggled through another twenty or thirty minutes, but most of SNL is just sooooo inane that I couldn't bear it. (Although, I did enjoy the Jar Glove skit. I've often noted how those mini-infomercials take a simple household task and make it look like a ridiculously complicated feat of physical and intellectual and emotional strength.) Anyway, I checked out YouTube for the Fey/Palin skit, and although there were approximately 8 billion of them posted, they had all been disabled for copyright infringement. For better quality and legal viewing that won't be disabled, see the clip above embedded legally from the nbc.com Web site.

Have you ever just started wandering around the Internet because you're bored and ended up in some completely outrageous (relatively speaking :) ) place? I didn't have to work all day, and as my night comes to a close, I just found myself doing that very thing. I didn't realize it until I found myself reading - word by word - an article on how to use a rough cut mower. I stopped about halfway through and thought, "Why the hell am I reading this?" I also took an online Italian lesson. It taught me enough to remind me that I've forgotten just about everything from those two Italian classes I took in college. I read all kinds of political news, which led to political blogs, which led to political satire videos, which led to me spending a half hour or so watching old clips from The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. I love it though. Google and Wikipedia can lead you down some crazy paths! I even found the last page of the Internet once - after reading about a molasses

I didn't have to get up for work this morning (FINALLY!) - so naturally, I woke up anyway. I looked at the clock and saw it was 7:45 a.m., and I panicked. I suddenly thought it was Thursday, and the girls were going to be late for school. So I went in and woke them. Gin said, "What? What day is it?" Then it hit me. "Saturday - nevermind." Of course, by that time I was up, so I checked out the hurricane update on cable news, then I went online to watch soccer. (I feel so compelled to say "football." I fear it would make me appear a bit pretentious. Like that last sentence.... Maybe I should anyway....) I watched Man U lose to Liverpool, then I went on my usual Saturday of picking up Book and having lunch with the kids at Nana's. Back home, I found Man City playing Chelsea, so I watched that one, too. Good way to spend a day off. I even caught part of the Inter Milano game, so of course, I had to watch what little I could on the unreliable web stream

Just in case you haven't been spending enough time online, there's a new site called Online Chat City that offers an Online Chat Room for video chatting! There's no need to download anything - you chat right in your browser window. Membership is 100 percent free for life. Users create their own profile and avatar, and can let people know as much or as little about themselves as they choose. The site's still brand new, so there aren't many people signed up right now, but gather up your friends and sign up together. Then you can video chat with all your friends all over the world for free - and without downloading anything! * This post is sponsored by Online Chat City

I was awakened at 6:30 a.m. by a phone call from Z. I answered and was promptly serenaded with "Happy Birthday." But it's not my birthday, which I told him. "But it's the 16th. Isn't it the 16th?" Two problems: today is not the 16th, and my birthday is not on the 16th. Today is the 12th and my birthday is the 22nd. "No, my birthday is the 22nd." "Since when?" (Huh?) *Chuckle* "Umm, since I was born." By....definition..... Oh well...I had to be up early anyway. Gin needed to be at school early because it was her morning to man the school store. And Munch had to get up early because she sneaked off to bed last night without finishing her homework. She still didn't get it finished this morning either. It was a day in the office today, but it wasn't too bad. It went quickly anyway. I don't overhear any of the interesting stuff anymore, because I've moved back over to the editorial side and away from the chatting

It wasn't the very first thought on my mind when I awoke this morning, but it came back to me very quickly. I was sitting at my desk at work (my former job) when my husband (at the time) called me up. I'm a little surprised that he even thought to call me. News of ANY significance has never had much of any significance for him. But he did call. He told me, "Two planes just hit the World Trade Center." It was just after the second one hit. No one in the office had heard a thing at that point. There was no radio or television in the office, and no one there made a habit of surfing the Internet, so the news story had not yet filtered in. I walked down to my boss's cubicle and told him, "My husband just called and said two planes just hit the World Trade Center." He asked if it was small planes or something. I said that I didn't know - all I knew was that planes had hit the buildings. I was scheduled to fly to New York City for a stamp show for work just

If you caught my little bio post earlier, you might recall that I have a somewhat disheveled family tree. My father was married 10 times. I have very little in the way of records, and I've been trying to track down some siblings and other family members. I've posted on genealogy boards, to no avail, but now I've found another site that might help. This site offers searches of Marriage License Records nationwide by state, county, city or zip code for specific names. I have at least nine to look for.... I'd better opt for the one-year access option rather than just the single report. He crossed a few states as well. And after I track down his wives, I can start looking for their kids. I still haven't quite figured out how to find the ones from women he DIDN'T marry. Hmmm....fourteen kids. I don't think any two were from the same mother...... I've got my work cut out for me. *This post sponsored by nationwidemarriagerecords.org

(I don't know what's going on with my comments. Whenever I try to reply, my computer freezes up on me. Hmm...... Anyway, THANKS to everyone who's commented recently! I'll keep trying....) We had a meeting at work today to figure out the new schedules for the switch from an afternoon to an evening paper. It turns out they want me to stay on the same schedule I'm working now - start between 8 and 9, and in the office Monday/Wednesday/Friday. They figure if we update the sites too early, it will undercut our attempt to increase single-copy sales with the morning publication. Also, I think they realized that if I'm posting the papers in the middle of the night, I'll NEVER be in the office - and they couldn't dare ask me to be. Ah well, I suppose I'm no better and no worse off this way. Maybe a little better...toggling the hours means fewer annoying coworkers are around during the day. :) I tend to work better independently, I think. Or I'm just a her

All of the kids were shuffled off to school this year, loaded down with so many new supplies on their first day that I feared for the seams of their backpacks - and their poor little legs and backs. And of the 350 or so individual items required for the start of school, everything has to be labeled with their names. I remember my own school days, so it's probably a good idea. It seems I've got my kids a lot more organized than I ever was. The first day usually went fairly smoothly, with everything laid out well in advance, checked off the list one by one, accompanied by the cutest little outfit I could talk my mother into buying for back to school - still crisp and new, carefully preserved for its debut on the first day of school. Unlike my kids, I'd never cheat and wear my new school clothes before school started. Back then, everything was labeled with a big, black permanent marker or one of those hard, plastic labels that never stuck (or if they did, got so bent up that t

I've never seen Star Wars. Any of them (except for parts of Episode 1, or whatever that prequel was called). People say this makes me weird. Anyway, I was flipping through the channels this afternoon, and I came across The Empire Strikes Back (which says it's Star Wars 5, but wasn't it the second one? whatever....). I felt somehow obligated to stop and watch it - probably because people keep saying I'm weird. Well, I got through about 20 mins. or so when I finally HAD to change the channel. I don't get it. I thought it was one of the dumbest things I'd ever seen. It was as if it was a parody of itself. I don't consider myself a big fan of sci-fi, even though Stargate SG-1 and Star Trek:TNG are former favorites of mine, and I've been known to watch shows such as ST:Voyager, Quantum Leap, Eureka, SG Atlantis and Doctor Who - religiously. I never liked Enterprise or the original Star Trek , except City on the Edge of Forever, but everyone likes that one. Ye

One word: yummy!

Wow...it's been more than two months since I've posted on my favorite searches to find my blog. Where does the time go? Anyway - still waaaaaaay up at the top is the variety of searches for Lifetime's Flying Tigress. Clearly, interest in the campaign is dropping off lately, because even though I still come up at the top of the searches, there aren't nearly so many anymore. Oh well, it was a heck of a run while it lasted. :) A few that caught my eye this time around are.... - *word flood* (three searches on this one) - *seitaridis girlfriend* (this one got two searches - I AM going to have to start doing my footie crush of the day again.....still waiting to catch Luca Toni playing again....even with my streaming online video, I haven't caught a game....) - *watch secret pleasures* (eleven total searches in all variations - obviously, they were disappointed when they arrived here....) - *wet demin* (two searches...hmm....) - *"sell this house" jamaican coupl

When I was working as a reporter - before I moved to the online side of the news biz - one of my jobs was to maintain the current list of sex offenders in our county. As a mom, I recognized quickly the value of being able to readily identify people in our area who might be a threat to my children. You can find out easily online where the registered child molesters are living near you. For example, click here to find Texas Child Molesters . Regarding of where you reside, start your search here , where you can search by state or ZIP code. There is a one-time access fee for reports and an additional fee if you would like automatic notification when a sex offender registers in your area. * This post is sponsored by registeredchildmolesterlist.org

Do you ever wonder why it is you hear about Ohio so much every four years? (Especially noting that it remains almost completely unnoticed at any other time) I live in Ohio - or as it has become known in the press "the battleground state of Ohio." We've been getting so much attention around here that BOTH presidential candidates are here in my state today trying to sway the maximum possible number of voters to their side. Ohio is known as the "Mother of Presidents," because seven men who would go on to become president were born here in Ohio - including three in a row, a feat matched only by Virginia (the third through fifth presidents). Presidents Grant, Hayes and Garfield were born in Ohio and served consecutively. Presidents Benjamin Harrison, McKinley, Taft and Harding also were born in Ohio. Another reason, though, that Ohio could be called the mother of presidents is that, traditionally, "as Ohio goes, so goes the nation." Ohio's results have

Great interview with Michelle Obama today on Ellen. Part one: Part two:

My weekend was anything but restful. I was working almost constantly, it seemed, and the kids were in rare form in the level of chaos they were creating. I've got a lot on my mind, too. As busy as I've been, my mind has been preoccupied elsewhere. It's a pointless place to dwell, but I can't seem escape it. I even managed to squeeze in watching a soccer game this weekend, and portions of a few others. I might have to start picking a footie crush of the day again - hehe! I haven't seen Luca Toni since Euro Cup. Mmmmm..... I'm looking forward to that.

I had a chat with my Italian friend F on Facebook today. He wanted to ask me some "European questions," as he called them. What he meant by that was, questions that all Europeans have about things they just do NOT understand about Americans. I know there are quite a few, so I was intrigued enough to open the floor to questions, and I set myself forth as the American ambassador. His first question was about Sarah Palin. He wondered if she would really help McCain's campaign, because in Europe, "she is a nightmare," he said. He pointed to her hardcore conservative views and her strong religious overtones. This is anathema to the Europeans. I had to explain to him how she could appeal to some people, and he did understand, but there is something uniquely American in that appeal that I'm sure escapes nearly everyone else in the world. Most of the rest of the world, I'm sure, sees only the policies, but we have a tendency in this country to vote with our hear

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I was talking with Pooh tonight about things that trigger certain memories for us - things that you always associate with one particular thing, regardless of how often we experience it. This trigger for this conversation was pineapple-orange juice. I'd pointed out that we had some, and I couldn't help spilling out that pineapple-orange juice always makes me think of the few childhood moments I had with my dad. On the rare occasions that he came to visit me when I was very young, we always stopped off at the local YMCA (it wasn't a slick fitness center like those of today - at that time it was some rooms upstairs with bunks, and downstairs was a basketball court, diner-style cafeteria and lockers around the walls). Dad used to stay there when he came through town, as the other railroad men did. Anyway, they had little cans of Bluebird pineapple-orange juice in the machines, and I always drank that when I was with him. So that's a memory. Another big one for me is the sme

Sarah Palin. Like her or not, the sister is FIERCE! Man, I was getting bored with this interminable presidential race, but it just got interesting again. I'm sure I am not alone in noting that this will probably be the first time in HISTORY that anyone will be remotely interested in the vice-presidential debate! Biden vs. Palin. Oh man! It's gonna be good! Biden is good and he's experienced, but this lady rocks! Regardless of politics, I like this chick. "Her speech was dripping in sarcasm," said Donna Brazile. Yeah, but you know what? So does mine. Women are good at that because men are clueless enough to miss it. It's entertaining for us. And we know the bright people can pick up on the real meaning behind our words. And we really don't give a damn what the morons think anyway. (She made me cringe a couple of times though. I wouldn't want to go up against her!) And apparently she was totally out of the blue after all. I found this blog post dated Au

I had to take a vacation day to get it, but it was a day off today. I took a bubble bath. Ate ice cream. Read a book. Made a fantastic dinner (slow-roasted Pan-Asian barbecue pork, roasted garlic and onion potatoes, and sweet corn with butter ginger sauce.) Debugged the desktop. Mostly did a lot of nothing and felt good about it. G sent a message today that he's off to yet another exotic locale - this time a stunning Greek beach. And he was kind enough to send a link to the exact location. So I know exactly what to be bitterly jealous of. Grr... It worked. I'm completely jealous. Office tomorrow. Who knows what that will bring? Gin starts swimming lessons this week too. Oh my exciting life. I'd better start doing things so I have something to write about. Nah. I just really need to get a break from my regular life for a while. I need just a *little* time away - really. One little escape....

Many thanks to my top droppers! 1. On The Bricks 2 . Kool Kustoms 3. 1 Blog and 2 Sides 4 . Cyber Camote 5. Everything Has A Reason