"I want, I want, I want ... but that's crazy"

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

To Whom It May Concern: I honestly wish you would just die

I figured out who was lurking here, and finding their way via my full, unfortunate married name. It threw me when I saw the curious searcher was in Dundee, Ill., but apparently my stupid ex-husband doesn't know the difference between Wisconsin and Illinois. He told me he was in Wisconsin, but he said the girls would see Chicago this weekend. Stupid moron.

He said I could come along and I told him no. When he asked why, I said, "Because I would have to be around you." When he asked why that was a problem, I said, "Because I don't like you." When he asked why not, I said, "Because you're a loathsome person." Then he asked what that meant.

How about a list?

(Feel free to skip the rest, if you're not the one this is directed to.)

* You're stupid. Honestly, you're one of the most stupid people I've ever known. You don't read. You didn't finish high school. There is absolutely no topic in existence on which you can have an intelligent conversation. You're a complete moron. Sorry, call me a bitch for it. I don't like stupid people and have no desire to hang around them.

* You're a bigot. You once told me that you wouldn't have married me if you'd known that I dated a black guy briefly in college. Yes. That would have been reason enough. Just that I dated a black guy once in college. Of course, you claim that it doesn't matter now. When I fell in love with P and did a LOT more than date him and for a LOT longer, you said that didn't matter to you. Bullshit. You're a bigot and that hasn't gone away and doesn't go away.

* I'm not a complete idiot. Oh, let's see. You cheated on me and lied to me CONSTANTLY before and after we were married. You even went so far as telling me to leave so you could be with your mistress who might or might not have been carrying your child at the time. Of course, it turned out it wasn't yours. It was her boyfriend's. Yeah, that's class. I took you back enough, and you kept shitting on me. Do you think there's any way I can NOT consider you to be an unforgivable asshole?

* Hey, just as an afterthought, why don't we throw in the time you spit in my face, knocked me down a flight of stairs, and threw my keys away so I'd have to walk six miles to get to my mother's - while I was supposed to be on complete bed rest because I was eight months into a difficult and delicate pregnancy. Not that it mattered to you before then either. I was supposed to be on complete bed rest, but I still had to do the grocery shopping then carry everything up the two flights of stairs to our apartment when I got home - all the while YOU were sitting on your ass in your chair - as usual.

* You're selfish. Yes, you always have been. Not just this weekend when you're taking the girls out of school because you were too lazy/selfish/stupid not to come back home last weekend while you were off work. So now you want them to ride in a car for 18 hours and miss a day of school to see you for - what? - a few minutes when you won't be working or sleeping?

* And there's the whole work thing. When's the last time you managed to hold a job? Oh yeah, you were working for a while off and on during those eight years since I left you. When's the last time you contributed any money to help take care of your daughters? Oh that's right, this week is the FIRST TIME! But you say you've spent the last eight years trying to make it up to me? How's that exactly? By being a worthless loser? Good role model there.

* Oh that's right. You being a worthless loser for the last eight years is MY FAULT. I forgot. What ever WASN'T my fault? I broke your heart, so you couldn't work and support your children for eight years. The breakup of the marriage was my fault, because I left you, NOT because you cheated and lied and spent a year in jail for selling drugs (FUCKING MORON) to the neighbor who had been getting it from you in exchange for videotapes and mowing the lawn and suddenly had enough cash to buy in quantity. But you were too stupid to even get suspicious about that. Well, you had to make some cash at the time, I guess, to support that woman you'd just thrown me out for.

Instead of asking why I don't like you, how about asking yourself what possible reason I could have TO like you. I don't care if you completely turn your life around and you're nominated for SAINTHOOD. I will always be nothing but appalled and disgusted by you.

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