"I want, I want, I want ... but that's crazy"

Friday, November 27, 2009

Annual Thanksgiving disgust

Thanksgiving was a quieter event than usual this year. My mother hosted it, like she always does, but rather than having all of her sisters and their children this year, she kept it to just "the kids," meaning me and my stepsiblings and our children.

I made the turkey, as usual - and as usual, it was a hit. I use Alton Brown's Good Eats Roast Turkey recipe, which is absolutely the best turkey recipe ever. I even passed it along to a friend this year, and hers was a smashing success as well. She thanked me profusely for that. Always happy to help. I also made a cheesecake, which was the only one of six desserts at the dinner that had no leftovers. I think I'll be recruited to make that one again too. I didn't hear anyone even mention any of the other desserts, but everyone was saying, "Wow, the cheesecake is soooo good!"

I don't interact much with my stepsiblings. They're not really my kind of people. We had two tables set up for eating, and they all sat at one, while my mom, my kids and I all ate at the other one.

After dinner, the conversation was pretty much the same way. It was a good thing too. I overheard some of the conversation in the other room, and I had no interest whatsoever in joining it. My son was stuck in that crowd at one point, during my stepsister's rant on how she will never allow her daughter to date someone who's not white. Pooh just had to roll his eyes and groan until he was able to escape. I told him and my mom that I wished I'd been able to bring P home for the holidays one time when we were dating. Hmmm, my Jamaican boyfriend. I wonder if the stepfamily would have been able to get past the skin and hair since he was a TV star. That would have been an interesting dynamic. It would have been fine for P. I warned him about their attitude very early on in our relationship. My mother used to have it in my youth, but year of training by me have since straightened her out. By the time P and I split up, she was so supportive of us being together that she even encouraged me to hold onto hope that he might come back. She's fully reformed now.

I still remember the very first time I met my other stepsister. I was a junior in college at the time, and I'd come home for the weekend. One of the very first thing's she said to me was, "Do you like black people?" As I just sort of gaped in stunned silence, she continued, "Because in (this town), if you like black people, you're a nigger lover." That was enough for me to know that I would NEVER want to be involved with that family any more than was strictly required. I was utterly disgusted.

What I hate more than anything is knowing that they are passing those disgusting attitudes on to their children. I can only hope that at least some of them manage intelligent thought on their own, because they are certainly not getting it from their parents.

At least my children know that when they come to finding love, I will always support and encourage them. I ask only that they find a good person who treats them with respect and dignity. It does not matter to me where they are from, what color their skin is or what sex they are.

My ex-husband once told me that if he'd known I kissed a black man in college, he never would have married me. Makes me wish it had come up in conversation earlier. I would have happily avoided that whole disasterous marriage. He also asked me what I would think if my son Pooh came home and told me he was gay. I told him I'd have no problem with it. I'd still support him and love him just the same, and it would make no difference to me whatsoever. He appeared to have a moment of clarity for just one moment and looked at me and said, "You really would, wouldn't you?" Well, of course I would.

Flashback Friday - Edie (Ciao Baby)

For this Flashback Friday, here's The Cult singing Edie (Ciao Baby)

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Prep day

I spent most of the day as many people did in the country today. I was preparing for Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow.

I procrastinated, as usual, so my preparations included a trip to the grocery store today. I got lucky though. It was crowded, but I was patient. I got a decent parking spot, and I had no wait at all for a cashier, so I was in and out pretty quickly.

I came home and made a cheesecake, which cracked, unfortunately. I could conceal it with some cherry topping, but it was requested plain, so the flaw will be obvious. I think it'll pass with the family, though. The cherries and chocolate will be served on the side, and I'll probably have quite a bit left to bring home. It'll taste good, so I'm not complaining.

I also have the biggest responsibility of the dinner. I'm making the turkey. I first made the turkey four or five years ago, and it went over so well that I've been asked to do it again every year. I use Alton Brown's Good Eats Roast Turkey recipe, so I have him to thank for making my family look forward to my centerpiece of the meal every year. I also have him to blame for my having to do it! Oh well. I love the praise.

The evening's mine now, so I'm kicking back with a drink. Wish I had a friend to unwind with, but I guess this'll do for now.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

I love finding a deal

I'm always looking for a way to save money, so I used the Local Offers Search Engine at Offeretti to find a good deal on services close to my home. Winter's coming, and I need to get my car ready. Right now, that's means I need an oil change, and I'm also going to need new tires. At Offeretti, I found a deal for $10 off an oil change, and I also found a deal to buy three tires and get the fourth one free. And as luck would have it, the same place with the tires has a deal on Offeretti for free starting, charging and battery check, so I can have that done at the same time. It's always a good idea to get that evaluated before the cold Ohio weather sets in. Not bad for a search that took me ten seconds.

Can I start titling every post "Whatever"?

I had a meeting to cover tonight. It was about a 45 minute drive to get there, and the meeting lasted about 25 minutes. I love those.

On the way there, I had two near-misses with deer on the road. On the way back, I took the normal route instead of the back road, and I'd forgotten that the road was closed at the railroad tracks. So two blocks from my house I had to turn off and make a four-mile detour.

When I got home and finished the story, I got a call from Book's dad saying that they'll be going out of town this weekend, so I won't be getting him Saturday. I wonder if I can get rid of the rest of the kids too. Oh well. It doesn't really matter. I've got nothing to do, and no one to do it with anyway.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Win a record deal!

This is a Sponsored Post written by me on behalf of Popstation. All opinions are 100% mine.



I'm a closet X Factor UK and American Idol addict. I don't really sing myself, except in the car and in the shower. But I know and understand the dream of becoming a pop star. The odds are long out in the real world - they're only slightly shorter if you can manage to get through one of those reality shows.

But you've got another option. You can make your break for the charts at PopStation, where you can sing for your chance at an album deal. Original Popstation songs are available in the practice rooms for two weeks. You pick what you want and make it your own, then enter the songs into the contest. Real people vote on your songs, and if you're good enough, work your way up to Number 1 on the charts.

Every three months, one Number 1 artist will, with a guest, be awarded a three-night trip to New York City to stay at a super-hip hotel and spend two days in a professional recording studio to record your own album with the help of a professional production team.

Finished albums are then posted on the Artists page at Popstation for the whole world to hear!

If you've got the dream to be a hip-hop, R&B, country, pop, rock, Latino or inspirational music star, take your chance to Win The BIG Deal at Popstation!

SocialSpark Disclosure Badge

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Good shopping :)

I went shopping with my mom today. She wanted to find me some new jeans for Christmas, so we went up to Old Navy, which was the source of my favorite jeans ever (jeans that have since disintegrated, so my wardrobe's been missing a "favorite pair of jeans" for a while now). As luck would have it, I picked out two pairs, tried them on, and they were both a perfect fit. How often does that happen? She got me a new pair of pajama pants too.

After that, we hit another store and happened to come across a couple of perfect Christmas gifts for my son Pooh. He's extremely hard to buy for, so we weren't about to pass that up.

Stop number 3 was a kitchen store, at which I was able to find a replacement for a recently broken kitchen gadget for $5 less than the previous one I'd bought, and it appears to be of higher quality and more durable than the last one as well.

In another store, I bought a new webcam, as the one I have for some reason disconnects me from the internet whenever I plug it in. Kind of negates the whole purpose of a webcam. When I got home, I hooked up the new one, and it seems to work perfectly. It's plugged in right now, and I'm still online. Seems that's another problem solved.

To top off the day, we stopped for Cinnabon. :) How much better can it get?

Friday, November 20, 2009

Flashback Friday - Play That Funky Music

Let's have fun with it. Wild Cherry's Play That Funky Music. :)

Another try

This will be my second attempt at a mobile post through my Blackberry (by e-mail). The first one worked, so I'm hoping this one does too. I tried checking Blackberry App World to see if there was a Blogger app available, but that app (BAW) always lags so badly that I got fed up and just restarted my Blackberry.

Does anyone know if there is a Blogger app for Blackberry?

Anyway, I'm posting this way because my Internet's been down half the night again. It's probably a good thing. I've been spending the past several nights feeding my insomnia by sitting up watching episodes of Ally McBeal online. I'd forgotten how much I liked that show, and since it's been almost ten years since I've seen it, it's like every episode is new. Hell, I'd even forgotten that Billy died - only about the most significant moment in the show's five seasons.

I do remember discovering Josh Grobin on the show, and I even remember most of that episode's plot. I have no idea what the name of the episode was, however, or which season it is. I guess I get to be pleasantly surprised when I come across it. I'm not quite to the end of the third season now, so I've still got many hours ahead to kill.
Hither and yon

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Not even a step

I'm starting to feel like I did a year and a half ago. I've been in this melancholy for a while now, but it's beginning to feel like a real depression again. The last time it was triggered by the loss of the man I loved more than any man I ever had before. This time I haven't lost anyone, because I haven't had anyone. But I think I know what it is anyway. I think I've begun to lose hope about the one I thought could be.

Sometimes I feel really stupid about it. I think about him all the time. For a while I really believed that something could come of it. I know I have this romanticized notion that you can really overcome anything if you love someone enough. And it didn't seem like that insurmountable of a thing. It's only geography. I'm not saying that we had some kind of great love. I just believed that the potential was there. And that it was worth exploring. If nothing came of it, at least we'd know. It's really not all that difficult to make that first step to find out. If it was as good as I thought it could be, then we could figure out the rest. If not, we'd know. But we can't even get to that first step, and now I'm beginning to feel the loss as if it was really there - as if all of it was really there. But we never even made the first step.

I'm not sure how I can really feel so bad about it. They say you can't miss something that you never had. That's the line of a song anyway. Of course, the next line is, so tell me why, why I could feel so bad. That's what I wonder, I guess. Why do I feel so bad?

Monday, November 16, 2009

New Moon on Monday

It's a new moon today. It's Monday. I almost missed it, but I couldn't resist it anyway. :)

Sunday, November 15, 2009

A new idea in the works

I was having a dream the other night - I won't get into the details - but as I was waking up a phrase repeated in my head. I thought it sounded like the name of a pretty cool drink. So I got up at 3 a.m., logged onto my computer and looked it up. As far as I could tell, it didn't exist.

A concept started developing in my head. What would this drink be? It all came together in my head perfectly. It was a little complicated, but I could work out the details.

This is part of my nature. I feel the need to create. It comes out of me in lots of different ways. I used to crochet a lot, because I wanted to make something out of nothing. I found that to be very satisfying, but unfortunately, my joints being what they are, eventually it reached the point that my wrists really couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't crochet more than a few rows before the pain became too much, and I'd find myself either pushing through and causing myself too much pain and then setting it aside for so long that my creative beginnings kept going unfinished.

Over the past few years, I've been letting my creative juices flow through my cooking. And of course, throughout everything, much of my creativity is expressed through my writing (don't expect it here - this is just a brain vent, not creativity but a pressure valve).

So anyway, my very first attempt at developing a drink is coming along nicely. I bought the necessary ingredients and made my first go of it last night. I wasn't able to attempt the full concept, but I've got the flavor right. I'll buy some glasses today and start sorting out the details. If I can get it all worked out, I'll have a grand unveiling. In the meantime, I'll be drinking. :)

Friday, November 13, 2009

It's getting colder again - yech!

Yesterday, I woke up, and the fog was so thick that I couldn't see the trees in my back yard. I don't mind the fog, but the ground was covered with frost. THAT I definitely didn't like. It means it's getting cold. I don't like cold. Unfortunately, I live in Ohio, where cold is inevitable.

I got to go on a little vacation to Florida recently, and I saw a friend there who moved from Ohio to Florida about 10 years ago. I must admit, I begin to envy that when the weather turns. Oh who am I kidding? I envy it anyway. The beaches and palm trees. The fact that there's some kind of life there. I could deal with that.

I could spend the day funning and sunning, swimming in the surf or just riding along with someone I love on our custom beach cruisers.

That sounds like a whole lot more fun than another winter in Ohio, doesn't it?

Friday the 13th

It's Friday the 13th. Will that mean anything to you? According to the superstitious, Friday the 13th is bad luck. According to cinemaphiles, Friday the 13th is a series of bad movies. The fear of Friday the 13th is called "paraskevidekatriaphobia." The fear of Friday the 13th movies is called "wussiness." Nah, I'm just kidding. The first one actually wasn't too bad for the genre and the period.

I suggest if you're a teensy bit freaked out over the day, have fun with it instead! Thumb your nose at it! Throw a theme party!

I do things a little more subtly. I just wear a white cable knit sweater and speak in a slightly breathy voice, warning people not to have sex on the beach. (Hey! Serve those as your drinks for that theme party!)

Flashback Friday - Broken Wings

This week for Flashback Friday, I present to you Mr. Mister's Broken Wings.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

The Dirty Joke

Two little fleas meet up to vacation in Florida every year. One year, one of the fleas shows up and he's cold and shivering and miserable.

The other flea asks him, "Why are you so cold?"

The first flea says, "Man, my trip was awful! I hopped a ride in Jersey, and I've spent the last eighteen hours zipping down the highway in the moustache of some dude on a Harley!"

The second flea says, "That's no way to travel! What you do is you go to the airport bar, have a couple of drinks, find yourself some sexy stewardess, crawl up her leg into her panties and nestle yourself down nice and cozy. Trust me, man. That's the way to go!"

So the next year the two fleas meet up again, and the one flea is again cold and shivering and miserable.

The second flea says, "Why are you cold again? Didn't you take my advice?"

The first flea says, "Yeah, I did just what you said. I went to the bar. I had a couple of drinks. I found myself a sexy stewardness, crawled up her leg into her panties, settled in all nice and cozy and warm, and I fell asleep. The next thing I knew, I woke up and I was zipping down the highway in the moustache of some dude on a Harley!"

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Blah and stuff

I got all settled in to work today (or yesterday, I guess, seeing as it's after midnight now), and then it turned out that I didn't have anything on my schedule. Yes, I finally forced myself into motivation to work, and there's nothing for me to do. I've got three stories to do tomorrow though. I wonder if I'll be remotely motivated then. Probably not.

I need a real job again. This whole freelancing thing feels so pointless and dead-end. I've been looking, but it is frightening how little is available. And of course, there's nothing in my field at all - at least not anywhere near me. I hate not having any options. I can't go anywhere else right now, because I'm bound by a custody arrangement for my son. That locks me in for the next five years. Not that I could afford to move anywhere anyway. There's quite a cost involved in that.

I wish I weren't doing all of this alone.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Flashback Friday - Two of Hearts

Isn't it fun? Flashback Friday this week is Stacey Q's Two of Hearts!

Decrescendo

The girls didn't have school today, so, naturally, they woke up very early and very loudly, ensuring that I would not be able to sleep in this morning. At least it gave Gin the opportunity to do the chores she avoided last night, because she had plans today to go to a friend's house to spend the night. She left at noon, and Munch and I were left with an afternoon to ourselves. We spent it watching "Chicken Little" then we went out for sushi for dinner. She was in heaven, of course. :)

After that I dropped her off to her dad, and I came home to find that Pooh was actually home. Well, he got the sushi leftovers. He did save me a little though. He's a good boy. The rest of my evening is watching a movie and reading a book. It's a quiet one.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

You gotta see this!

ContestAbbott Medical Optics Inc. (AMO) is sponsoring aniLASIK Video Contest inviting entrants to make a video showing how better vision can make or has made their lives better.

Users can submit a video in one of three categories: "My contacts are getting in the way of my good time"; "My favorite sport or activity would be so much cooler with better vision"; or "You should see life after the iLASIK procedure."

Once you submit a video, get your friends to vote on it by posting a link on your blog, Facebook page, Twitter - or any way you can think of to promote it. The grand prize winner gets $5,000, so if you haven't had iLASIK, your prize money will get it for you, or if you have, you can use that money to do all the things that are so much better now that you've got great vision! Three first prize winners will be awarded an HDTV package valued at $2,500 (one per video category). Three second prize winners will receive the Flip UltraHD camcorder (one per category).

I got my LASIK surgery about seven years ago, and I can't begin to tell you how much I love it! Whenever a friend complains about their glasses or contacts, I immediately point to my eyes and say, "LASIK! Get it! Best thing EVER!" I had contacts, but I rarely wore them because they were such a hassle, so I usually wore my glasses. Anyone who wears glasses knows what a pain that can be. The first thing I did after I got my eyes fixed was go to Sak's and buy myself a pair of gorgeous high-end designer sunglasses! Since I'd worn my glasses all the time, I never got to wear sunglasses, so I figured I deserved a real treat. That was the start of a fixation, because I started buying more and more and more sunglasses! And when it's gray and rainy out, I no longer have to try to see through the foggy, wet lenses on my glasses. When I swim, I can actually see other people around me, rather than being surrounded by a blurry fog. It's fantastic!

Post?slot_id=82832&url=http%3a%2f%2fsocialspark

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Back in the office for a night

Like a fool, I agreed to help out with the election coverage in the office tonight. It was probably a good thing, too, because I got out of there at midnight, which was half an hour past the copy deadline, and we still didn't have all of the stories in from the people writing them. Hey, I got my three stories done, so I really don't care about the rest. I wasn't responsible for them, and I came through on my end - again, for a newspaper that won't hire me full time (because the company won't authorize any new hires). It's hard not to take a "so what?" attitude with them after a while.

I did get to hear a little fun news while I was there. It seems that the fellow who replaced me at my old job will be leaving there soon. I expected he would, but the really sweet part is that he is moving on to something waaaay better (like five times the salary), which is just a sweet little thumb of the nose to the DICK publisher of the paper. I so don't miss it at ALL.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

I've had better... but I've had worse

Since Halloween, I've been overindulging in the abundant candy in the house. When I went grocery shopping today, Halloween candy was half price. So, guess what? I bought more. I don't think I've ever had this much candy in the house. It could be dangerous. I've been a little depressed lately, and now I've got a massive supply of chocolate on hand. Oh well, I suppose I lost so much weight that I've got a little room to spare - particularly in all of my jeans. Of course, I've still got the upcoming overindulgence in meat and cheese nibbles for the rest of this month and most of next, along with some fruitcake coming soon as well. Maybe I should watch myself.... but then again, why? Who else is looking anyway?

Other high points of the day include my son Book breaking his glasses, me getting a hard rap on the elbow that five hours later still has me wincing whenever I bend it, and getting caught up in a caravan for an opposing school returning home from some sporting event (they honked and jeered when we turned off to go toward home).

Yesterday, however, had me watching Manchester United beat Blackburn 2-0. That was a happy. :)

I've got work to do. I should probably go get it done.