"I want, I want, I want ... but that's crazy"

Monday, December 1, 2008

I've got the *real* Mac virus...

I've become a pretty big Mac fan since I got my laptop for work about a year ago. I didn't realize how high a pedestal I'd placed Mac on, though, until today. I was home from work, surfing some blogs and all was going well. Then suddenly, when I was in the middle of typing a comment on a blog, my screen went black. The screen on my MacBook Pro...just...went...black. I was dumbstruck. I was in shock - I mean, to a degree comparable to seeing a stranger shot dead in front of me. I sat staring at the black screen, thinking, "What the hell?!?! This is a MAC! This doesn't happen!"
I've worked on Windows PCs for years and years, and frankly, whenever one crashed on me, my response was something like, "Damn it! Typical! Piece of crap!" But when my Mac just went black, I was ... stunned ... bewildered ... speechless.
Even now, I'm typing away just perplexed as to what happened and wondering if it will happen again.
I have to laugh at my reaction even more because I saw the new episode of The Simpsons last night (the first new one I've seen in a while, incidentally). At the beginning of the episode, the Simpsons were at the mall and there was a new "Mapple" store (Apple, but with an extra bite taken out). The store was a massive, futuristic glass structure filled with every surreal Mac stereotype imaginable. Then Steve "Mobs" giant image appears with a message and all the Mapple disciples turn to face and worship him.
Anyway, as I watched last night, I laughed at the Mac stereotypes being parodied. Then here I sat today, dumbstruck, when my Mac *gasp* failed.
I was looking up Mac viruses, to see if perhaps there had been some threat, but everything I read said that Mac OSX is still 100% virus-free. I think the "Mac virus" though is something entirely different. The "Mac virus" does not infect the computer - it infects the user. And it's not the product of some hacker - it's the product of Apple. It makes you have to have a Mac (or iPod, or iPhone, etc.). Then when you have it, it makes you dependent upon it. Then when you are dependent upon it, it makes you worship it. It becomes the "one thing you can't live without" in your social networking questionnaires. You become part of the cult. And now, it seems they've gotten me too.

7 comments:

Ed said...

When I read the title of your post, I thought you got sick eating Big Macs. :)

Vincent said...

Guess I'm immune. The Macs I'm forced to use have crashed frequently, too, but I'm not really frustrated by that. It's more the small usability hazards that make me want to kill something when using them.

(Why the hell can't I *cut* in the Finder? No, that's _not_ a feature! And dragging is _not_ an alternative!)

Goddess said...

You know, that lack of a *cut* feature is a complaint I've heard before. I guess I've never really needed it enough for it to bother me at all.
I had some issues with my old Mac, but my MacBook has been almost preternaturally reliable up to now.

Stefanie said...

*stands up* Hi, my name is Stefanie and I am a Macaholic.

As great as they are, and although I will never go back to Windows, Macs aren't entirely infallible. My husband's Macbook, which was about a month old, acted up one night, and then wouldn't boot up the next day... at all. He took it in to the store and they gave him a new one. Apple customer service is awesome :)

Sorry if this comment comes through twice, I'm having some router issues.

Jackie said...

Here in South Africa Macs have never really caught on due to their high cost so we tend to go the Microsoft route.

LOL... I therefore also thought immediately of McDonalds ... spreading their evil virus throughout the World, like all big burger and chicken chains, adding more to global warming than industrial and vehicle emissions.

Unbalanced Libra said...

I am a Mac addict. I LOVE my iMac and my MacBook more than...well...most things, LOL

Perky said...

I don't even have a MackBook (yet... it's going to be my Christmas present :D ), but I completely worship it ;)